Auto Repair Shop Owner's Daily Dose 55: Moms (Family)

Moms by Rick White, President 180BIZ

Today, in my Family Edition, I want to talk about Moms. Moms are amazing. Let's face it, if it weren’t for your mother, you wouldn't be here, right? I realized there are some people right now that their moms aren't here anymore. But I want to tell you, they're still there. They're still inside. How many of you still hear your mom's voice every day? I am blessed. My mom and dad are still alive. They're getting along in years, but they're still here. I don't get to see my mom as much as I would like.  Were down in Virginia, my mom's in Massachusetts. I haven't seen her since January.

Things are a little bit weird right now with all the stay at home orders and things like that. So let me ask you a question. How are you going to make mother's day special? One of the things that my mom and I still do is we make time for a cup of tea over skype.  It’s something that I love to do. I realized that there is so much of both my parents in me and we can talk about dad and June. But what I get from my mom is my sense of fairness, my sense of duty and obligation, my sense of guilt. They all come from my mom.

What has your mom done for you? What has your mom gifted you in raising you and bringing you up? What did she bring that you have adopted? There are certain traits that I have that I can say, “That’s my mother.” So, I want to ask you to step back and think about what traits you have today that are making you a better person. And it's because of your mother. And if your mom's around, make sure you touch base with her.  And if your mom's not here, she's watching you. You have another angel watching over you. 

The other mom that I want to talk about is your spouse. I have kids and I got to tell you something. When I held each my children for the first time, it was just like mind blowing. My little babies. Our oldest is 38 and our youngest is 23.  

I want you to think about everything that you have. You know that your mother's poured into you that has helped you become the person you are. But let me tell you something. Let me tell you, I got ex-wives, but they're still the mother of my children and I have learned so much and been given so many gifts from all the women in my life. And you know something. I'm not taking anything away from Brenda. Brenda is absolutely amazing. These women that are in your life, that have given birth to your children, guys I'm talking to you, you must appreciate them. Step back and look at what they did. Look at the gift they are giving you. If you got little ones right now, hold onto the man. Please hold onto them. They grow up so fast and I know it doesn't feel like that when you're in the moment.

I'm going to ask you to think about one last thing. There's a difference between attention, caring and loving. And why am I saying that? I'm saying that because I've had a problem understanding the difference between caring for somebody and loving somebody and even if I'm going to be 58 in July, even now I'm still learning this. Caring is when I do something for somebody. You know when I make my wife breakfast in the morning. That's not loving her, that's caring for her. When I make her a coffee. That's not loving her, that's caring for her. Loving her is when I put her before me. It’s when I go through something and think Brenda first.  It’s when I see what she's going through when I look below the surface.  Because guys, it's easy just to see our wives and our girlfriends at the surface level and that doesn't work.

Women are like gold mines and you've got to dig your whole life to find the nuggets of gold that just make your life amazing. This is what I am learning. So there's a difference between paying attention to somebody, like giving them your time, which I think we do a lot of times we give them FaceTime, but our minds aren't there. Our hearts aren't there, and they don't have our presence. So, I want you to understand that there's a difference between attention, caring, and love. You know when you're just there, that's a tension. When you do something for somebody that's caring, but when you are fully present, when you are in the moment, when you are there, when you are connected, when you are transparent, when you let people in this is when you are loving.

So, for today I'm going to ask you to step back and ask yourself, “How can I be more authentic? How can I be more present with the people that are in my lives? The ones that matter most?” We can spend all week worrying about the business and be preoccupied. Businesses come and go. But the people that are in our lives, the gifts that cost us nothing are the most important gifts in the world. Money comes and goes. It’s the easiest thing to replace. But you can’t replace a loved one. So, stop taking things for granted and really be present with your family, with your mom, with your dad, with your brothers and sisters, with your spouse and with your children, with your grandchildren.

I understand things are weird right now. Sometimes we can't get out or we are getting out but need to be careful. It just means we've got to do something different. Right? Right now I haven't been able to see my grandkids that are living about 15 minutes away. And it's because they're doing things and going out and doing stuff and we respect that. But right next door is my mother in law, and I like my mother-in-law. We've need to keep her safe. So, we're distancing. Today I'm going to be on Skype with my grandsons. That's what I'm going to do today for them.

But today with tomorrow when it comes to Mother’s Day. Things are a little bit different these days.  Understand and appreciate them in their world. To all the moms that are out there this morning, I want to say happy mother's day, and I know my mom's going to be watching this. Mom, I love you.

Remember there's a difference between paying attention and giving someone your attention. Caring and loving. Open yourself up. Be real and watch the magic that happens. It's absolutely amazing. Take care of yourself today. God bless.