JUST ONE THING
Choose Happiness
Episode 80
With Rick White, 180BIZ
Today’s topic is about being happy. Isn't that really all we want out of life? To feel happiness? I will tell you something that I think is a real misnomer. There are two real points I want to make in this episode.
The first point is that you must pursue happiness. I believe our founding fathers were human and they got it right. We have the right to liberty. But when they said we have the right to the pursuit of happiness was a mistake. Most of us have a sentence that says, “I'll be happy when…” and then we finish it. I'll be happy when I get a tech, I'll be happy when I do this much in sales, I'll be happy when I get this car out.
Now, if you're like any other human being, you will set a goal and think that happiness is on the other side of that goal. But I say it’s not. As a business development coach, I see shop owners get so excited to hit their goals. And then a couple of days, weeks, or even months later, they realize it’s not that exciting and they go into a depression. Because what they thought was on the other side, they can't find it. It's not there. And that's the lie we're telling ourselves.
You don't pursue happiness. You choose happiness. Why? Because if you're pursuing happiness that’s on the other side of a goal, once you hit that goal you’ll set another. Then you hit that goal and set another. You’ll never see happiness. Happiness will always be on the other side of something that you're chasing to get. You will end up feeling not good enough. You feel down in the dumps. It’s an issue.
So, the first thing I want you to understand is you don't pursue happiness. You choose it. There's a really great author, a Harvard psychologist named Sean Achor, who has a great TED Talk, and it's about 18 minutes long. They've done scientific studies where most people think that happiness is on the other side of success. And those people are the most miserable in the world. They don't get the success that they could and should have. What they've found is it's backward. Happiness is in front of success. In other words, you are happier about what you're going through, and what you're doing, when you're enjoying the journey when you are not so focused on the crap you're going through today or something that's way off in the future. You're enjoying the journey, getting up, and realizing it's a day of growth, a day of change, a day to make a difference.
Happiness lives right here in the moment. We choose happiness. You might say, “But Rick, I'm going through some crap right now.” Aren't we all? We all have challenges, whether they be in business or relationships or health, etc. We can either stare at everything that's going wrong, or we can step back just a little bit and start to ask ourselves, “What am I grateful for?”
Many know that I had a problem with my back last year. It's taken a long time to get better. I must tell you something. I was out in Vegas last week doing some training. I walked eight miles one day with no assistance. There were tears in my eyes. They were tears of joy realizing that a year ago I was using a walker. Sometimes our happiness has to come from our journey from where we've been to where we are now and seeing that progress.
My second key point is the law of familiarity. You may be worried about someone stealing your car or robbing you. But all that stuff can be replaced. The stuff that you should be grateful for, the stuff that you should treasure, there's no price tag on it. I don't know what I would do if I lost my wife, Brenda. We just get so used to that other person being in our lives we may take them for granted.
But the best way to become grateful for something is to picture it gone from your life. What if I didn't have my business anymore? You have any freedom or you won’t be able to come and go as you please.
So, the first message is you don't pursue happiness. You choose it. The second is everything that's truly valuable in your life you can’t put a price tag on it. Don’t take it for granted. Your ability to stand up and walk is a gift. Your ability to be reading or listening to this message right now is a gift. Some people can't. The fact that you opened your eyes this morning is a gift.
Being grateful doesn't change stuff. It doesn't change the stuff we go through. It changes us. It changes us as we go through it. It changes your focus. I'll give you an example. I don't like going to the gym. But I will start going back to the gym. But I love how I feel afterward. I feel proud of myself for doing it and pushing through it. I feel great physically after doing it.
So, what are some things that you're taking for granted? The people in your life, the house that's over your head, the food that's in your refrigerator, the business that you created, and have a choice to either see it as a blessing or a nightmare.
The key to being happy is choosing to be happy and then asking yourself better questions. How can I find more joy in my day today? How can I make a difference today? How can I be God's angel today? How can I help someone that desperately needs it today?
Could that be you?
Stay safe, have fun, and go make some money.